The Frog and The Princess
by Mac Granger
Summary: Jane and Maura hang at The Dirty Robber. All is well until Maura gets knocked out... Then things change.


**Disclaimer: **R&I does not belong to me. Do I really need to write this every time? It's just cruel.

**A/N: **This story came to me randomly after a bike accident gave me concussion. I started it months ago, and it's kicked my ass trying to finish it. It's a tiny bit different for me, so I really would appreciate your thoughts on it. I hope you enjoy!

HUGE thanks to the awesome and lovely Harrytoad for checking the first 2/3's of this over, and encouraging me to finish it. Much appreciated.

Big thanks to the anonymous reviewer who pointed out my glaring spelling mistake at the end. Can't believe I did that!

* * *

Boston. The city that never sleeps. No wait. That's New York. Boston. The walking city.

Really? They call it that? How…fun!

Boston. The city where Jane Rizzoli so rarely sleeps.

There, that's better. Well, not for our sleep deprived grouchy, but loveable, detective. The day had been a long one. Murders, chasing down suspects, doughnut and coffee runs; that sorta thing. Now though, now Detective Jane Rizzoli was finally able to relax.

Pushing open the door to her favourite drinking establishment, The Dirty Robber, Jane smiled as she spotted her booth. The smile only grew wider as her eyes drifted to the city's very own Chief Medical Examiner, Doctor Maura Isles.

Approaching the incredibly sexy, dolled up, honey blonde present in said booth, Jane turned her swagger up to 11 and owned the room before taking her seat.

Opening her mouth to speak, Detective McBadass was cut off by a most unwelcome voice.

"Hey, Princess? Wanna ditch Detective Dyke and come out back with me? I'll show you a good time."

The fiery Italian zeroed in on the rather rude intruder, watching as the obscenely sweaty, drunken man grabbed his dick, and leered at the beautiful Doctor.

Those in the near vicinity that knew the Detective, were thinking that Jane Rizzoli was about to throw down. Break out that famous temper of hers and knock the rude man the fuck out. They were incorrect. Jane laughed. She reached out and squeezed his miniscule cock, and laid it out for him.

"Please her with this?" She squeezed a little tighter as the now weeping man tried not to squeal. "My dick's bigger than yours!"

Pushing the pathetic, puny man away, Jane faced the blonde Princess opposite. "Sorry about that, Maur."

"It's quite alright, Jane. That man was rude and rather ill informed. You're not a 'dyke' and I very much doubt anything that might take place round the back of this establishment could qualify as a good time."

At this point my gentle reader, I'd hazard a guess that you're all rolling your eyes, laughing hysterically or sighing at Maura's inability to see just how very gay Jane Rizzoli is. Good. You should. The genius Doctor is clearly in need of a battery change on her gaydar. That butch, gay!

Jane coughed. "Uh, yeah. Totally."

Maura Isles pushed a beer in Jane's direction. "For you."

Time stood still as the two the biggest gaymo's in Boston eye fucked for a minute, or three.

Clearing their throats simultaneously, Maura looked away and Jane took the opportunity to check out the M.E's spectacular rack.

"Spectacular." The Detective drooled. Eyes glazing over. She leaned forward resting her chin on her fist. A lazy grin gracing her features.

"What's spectacular? Jane?" Maura waved her hand back and forth in the air trying to gain the woman's attention. Unfortunately… Oh, who am I kidding, very fortunately, this just caused Maura's sizable assets to bounce around some. Jane's lazy grin turned into her stupidest grin, she didn't care, she was getting the worlds best show, and it was free!

Maura glanced down to see what Jane was scrutinising so intently. "Is there something on my dress?" After a moment she noticed a dog hair on the expensive material and removed it. She looked up at Jane, suitably impressed. "Good eye, Jane. Although next time instead of staring you could just tell me."

Our intrepid detective snapped back to attention. "HUH?" Eyes wide she stared innocently back at Maura. "Oh, yes. Of course. Next time. You got it. …Listen how about we go back to yours, slip into something more comfortable, kick back together on the couch and watch a film? Sound good?" Not waiting for an answer Jane tossed back her beer and waited for Maura to rise.

Just as the chivalrous detective stepped forward to help, our foolish sweaty drunken lout from earlier reappeared.

He unwisely shoved an accusing finger in Jane's face. "I know you. I'd know that face anywhere. Rizzoli. HA! Frog face Rizzoli."

If you weren't convinced of this male specimens inferior brain capacity before hand, hopefully that little show tipped the scale.

As the man laughed in her face, Jane called over her shoulder. "Sorry about this, Maur."

Left hand balling into a fist, Jane slugged the guy, and watched amused as he fell to the ground clutching his unappealing face.

Business taken care of, Jane turned to face her girl. Scooping up Maura's jacket from the booth, she shook it out and held it open for the petite honey blonde to step into.

"That was hardly the mature response, Jane."

Jane pulled her 'Like I give a fuck' face and shrugged. "Though I must admit, it did find it strangely thrilling to see you physically put him in his place."

Jane smiled cockily and shook the raised coat in her arms. As Maura turned to step into it, slipping her arms into the sleeves, Jane felt movement close behind her.

Maura continued to share her thoughts. "Frog face? I don't see how any human could possibly have a frog face."

Turning to see what was going on behind her, Jane saw a raised bar stool coming towards her. Instinctively ducking, Detective Jane Rizzoli, best friend to Maura Isles, realised a moment too late just what her ducking meant. She grimaced as the stool connected with Maura, and watched helplessly as the Doctor slumped to the ground.

Furious, she pulled her piece and aimed it square between the soon to be dead mans eyes. "You got three seconds before I pull this trigger. I suggest you run. Now. One… Tw-"

Unsurprisingly, the man ran screaming from the bar, urine fast soaking through his pants and running down his leg.

"Pussy." Holstering her weapon, Jane crouched down beside the fallen woman. Grimacing at the nasty bump she was sure to have. "Maur, Maur wake up." She was out cold. Taking a reassuring glance at the rise and fall of the Doctor's chest, Jane scooped her up in deceptively strong arms, taut muscles flexing with the lift.

Placing the woman carefully in the back of her car, Jane swiftly drove Maura home and lay her delicately down on her bed. Lying down beside the 'sleeping beauty' Jane called softly to Maura once more.

* * *

Stretching languidly, Doctor Maura Isles slowly opened her eyes. She gasped as she realised she was lying in a field, patches of daisies growing all around her. Sitting up, she looked down at herself to find she was in a beautiful ball gown.

Her eye's snapped up, seemingly searching for something. Perhaps someone?

I think we all know who…

Walking toward a line of tree's, Maura started to hum. Sweet bird song filling the air as the native birds sang along with the doctor.

Smiling she looked around, sure she was missing something.

I'm pretty sure we just covered this.

Walking through the tree line, the fair doctor found herself beside a beautiful stream.

"My, this is a beautiful stream." The waters musical trickling calling to her, she reached down into the clear liquid, scooping up a handful into her mouth, hoping the cool water would quench her thirst.

"Lady, are you crazy? You never heard of Giardia? Drinking water from my stream like you don't have to worry about that shit."

The doctor looked round, trying to identify the location of the gravely voice, frowning to herself when she could not. "Hello?"

"Down here, lady!"

Puzzled hazel eyes swept downward and back. Just behind her sat a frog.

Jumping at the sight, the gorgeous woman brought her hand to her chest. "Oh my. A talking frog."

"It's crazy, right. Almost like this were a dream or something."

The wide eyed woman stared at the small creature, nodding in agreement. Completely missing the deadpan sarcasm.

"Oh, I know! This is an absurd situation. I wonder if I'm hallucinating?"

"Riiiight."

Daintily seating herself on a rock by the gentle stream, our obviously dreaming M.E. turned once more to her new friend.

"So are there many talking frogs in these parts?"

"Just me, lady."

"Oh, that must be terribly lonely for you."

The frog hopped a little closer. "Not really. Pretty ladies seem to have a habit of finding me. Think I'm gonna turn into a prince or some shit, if they kiss me. Idiots! No brains, the lot of them! I mean, do I look like a dude to you?"

The cheerful, intently listening doctor opened her mouth to reply, but was cut off by the talking frog.

"It was rhetorical. Although, the fact you opened your mouth to reply tells me you're a smart one. What's your name anyway?"

"It's Maura; and thank you. A good education is a wonderful thing, and I was lucky enough to be sent to the best schools…"

As Maura spoke, the frog leapt up onto Maura's lap, then up onto her shoulder.

"Hopefully our interaction will be a little more stimulating for you."

The frog tore its gaze from the bountiful chest below. Blinking eyes staring into the friendly ones not two inches from her. "Oh, you're stimulating, alright!"

A smile more radiant than the sun was bestowed upon the lucky frog; who promptly found itself grinning stupidly back.

"Such a charming frog!" Leaning in, Maura gave a quick kiss to her new friend.

The frogs eyes grew wider than they already were.

"That was for being so sweet. I promise I have no expectations for you to metamorphasize into a prince."

Aside from our lovable, but oft oblivious, doc completely missing that our familiar frog friend was in fact perving on her sizable assets, she was also currently failing to see that the little green gal was looking rather pained.

"What did you…" The question tailed off as the amphibian stumbled, then fell off Maura's shoulder.

A panicked look over took the honey-blonde princess. "What's wrong? Can I help?"

The frog started to shudder and shake.

Maura looked around in the vain hope of seeing a passer-by who might be able to help.

"Mauraaaa."

Snapping back to her fallen friend, our adorable doc watched in surprise as the frog stretched and grew and changed before her very eyes.

"Oh, my." Biting down on her lip, Maura took in the gorgeous specimen before her.

Tall, wild dark hair, olive skin and a delectable body, the frog had indeed not turned into a prince, but a stunning, strangely familiar, female Adonis. A very naked female Adonis.

"Maura?"

* * *

"Maura?"

Looking around, unsure what to do, Jane Rizzoli leaned in close to the mumbling slowly waking woman.

"Maur? You okay?"

Blinking slowly, Maura opened her heavy eyelids. Not a hairsbreadth from her, our gradually waking princess was greeted by the sight of her newly human former frog friend.

Maura surged forward. Her lips connecting hungrily with Jane's.

Enjoying the moment and forgetting herself, Jane kissed the honey blonde back with equal fervour… Then realised her M.E. might be brain damaged or something.

Pulling away with a strength of will unknown to man, the brunette looked down in concern at her friend.

She was most surprised to see her lower lip cutely poking out. "Are you pouting?"

The Doctor nodded. Reaching a hand out, she securely wrapped it around Jane's bicep. Holding her in place.

"Yeesh, woman. You've got a strong grip. Remind me never to mess with you."

Holding fast, she purposefully stroked over the fabric of her shirt. "I liked it better when you were over here, and had less clothing on."

The Detective raised a surprised brow. Watching as Maura ran her eyes greedily over her body. She didn't know what was going on, but it was hard not to like it.

Still, she was a gentleman… woman… whatever the female version of that noble shit was. She would behave herself.

"I think you need to get some rest, Maur. That blow seems to have rattled that big beautiful brain of yours."

Maura looked in confusion at Jane for a moment. Her head tilting to the side in that ridiculously adorable manor she had. "You think I'm not myself."

It was hard for Jane to resist saying 'no shit!' or some such like. This wasn't the Maura Isles she knew. The Maura Isles she knew was never so forward… with her.

Jane took a moment to mentally castrate every lucky fucker that had had the opportunity to experience the naughtier side of Dr. Isles.

"Well, Maur, can you blame me? You're talking about me being naked and sticking your tongue down my throat. It's not exactly your normal behaviour."

With the sexy blonde laid out before her, giving off every sign she wanted to get in her pants, our lovable badass Detective Rizzoli, was clueless as to why she was fighting this. And as she was wont to do when this kind of thing happened - which was never (she was pretty sure she'd remember banging hot ladies throwing themselves at her), she stood frozen.

Maura took pity on her clueless friend.

Tugging on shirt material still clasped in her hand, she tugged Jane back down onto the bed.

"Jane." She dragged the name out. Letting it fall possessively from her lips. "I'll admit I was disorientated when I first awoke, but I can assure you that I am quite clear as to who you are."

She tugged again, causing the bewildered Detective to fall forward, forcing her to throw her arms out to either side of the very clever honey-blonde.

Effectively pinned by her Boston Italian, Maura smirked up at the flustered woman. "Why are you making me work so hard for this Jane? I know you want this. Me."

With Maura's lips achingly close and her breath mingling with her own, a frustrated growl escaped the dark haired Detective.

This was too much to resist. She may gods gift to awesome; but Maura Isles was revved up and ready to go.

"You're really, you? YOU you, I mean?"

Rolling her eyes, the honey-blonde bombshell reached up, slowly undoing the buttons on Jane's shirt, her fingers ghosting across the hot skin beneath. "Yes, Jane. I am myself. Now… less talk."

She leaned forward to close the barely there distance between them, but Jane drew back one last time. "One last question princess. What brought this on?"

A too innocent look settled over the features of the woman below her.

"Your frog face."


End file.
